When LGBTQ+ People with Substance Use Addiction are in Denial

When LGBTQ+ People with Substance Use Addiction are in Denial

Is your LGBTQ+ loved one in denial about their addiction? How do you help an LGBTQ+ person living in denial? Some say denial is the primary roadblock to addiction recovery, and we couldn’t agree more. Many LGBTQ+ people living in denial aren’t ready to admit they have a problem, let alone spend a month or more in addiction treatment. Unfortunately, this denial stops some LGBTQ+ people from receiving the help they need to kick their habit and move forward in their lives. So how can you help an LGBTQ+ person with an addiction see things more clearly?

Understanding Addiction Denial in LGBTQ People

Addiction denial is a psychological defense mechanism that prevents LGBTQ+ people from admitting their substance use struggle. It is important to understand that denial is not just a mere refusal to admit the truth; it is a complex mental and emotional process that distorts an LGBTQ+ person’s perception of reality.

Denial in addiction operates on both conscious and subconscious levels. On a conscious level, LGBTQ+ people may deliberately ignore the negative consequences of their addiction, choosing to focus only on the perceived benefits or temporary relief they receive from their substance or drug abuse.

On a subconscious level, addiction denial can be even more insidious. The mind can employ various defense mechanisms to protect LGBTQ+ people from the emotional distress associated with acknowledging their addiction. For example, they may suppress memories related to their substance use, rationalize their behavior or redirect blame onto external trauma or people.

Why is Denial Common Among LGBTQ People with Addiction?

As a person on the outside, it can be extremely difficult to understand how an LGBTQ+ person in addiction denial can’t see the damage they are doing. However, LGBTQ+ people who have an addiction are not able to think clearly. The addiction is in control, and it causes the queer person to be obsessive about getting high or drunk, no matter what the consequences are. Additionally, there may be external trauma such as homophobia, stigma, discrimination, and violence that cloud the queer person’s judgment. If an LGBTQ+ person is struggling with these or trying to push away these painful experiences, they’re likely to have a harder time thinking rationally and understanding the importance of addiction treatment. Here are some of the most common reasons why LGBTQ+ people struggling with addiction are in denial: 

• They Think They’re in Control. Some LGBTQ+ people in addiction truly believe they are in control of their drug and alcohol use struggle. This is an illusion, because people who are addicted to drugs or substance use cannot just stop using.
• They Seem Unconcerned. Sadly, some queer people struggling with addiction reach a point where they don’t care about themselves or the damage they are doing. This usually happens because the addiction has ruined so many parts of the individual's life. They feel like they've gone too far to stop.
• They See Themselves as The Victim. You may have noticed that any time you try to discuss rehab with your LGBTQ+ friend or loved one, they turn into the victim. However, being in a difficult situation does not make it okay for anyone to continue to abuse drugs and alcohol. There are other ways to cope.

Helping an LGBTQ Person in Addiction Denial

Whether you are trying to help an LGBTQ+ family member with drug addiction, or are trying to help an LGBTQ+ friend with substance use addiction, there are many ways you can go about this, but the first step is helping them recognize the struggle. The inbuilt flaw of addiction denial is that, since it’s a subconscious mechanism, the LGBTQ+ person doesn’t know what they are doing. This doesn’t mean there are no solutions for overcoming this obstacle blocking the path to sobriety, though. Many of these methods will be poorly received, and they won’t all work for every LGBTQ+ person in addiction denial. See which of the following might be fruitful for dealing with the denial of addiction in your LGBTQ+ loved one, friend, or family member.

1. Speaking with Other LGBTQ+ People in RecoveryDo you have LGBTQ+ friends and family members who have successfully recovered from addiction? If so, asking them to speak with your LGBTQ+ loved one might be beneficial. There’s every chance your addicted queer loved one will feel some common ground with a queer person who has personally experienced what they are going through.
2. Speaking with An Addiction TherapistYou should never attempt to make an appointment for your LGBTQ+ loved one or family member to see an addiction therapist without their consent. The more you try to force a solution like this, the more resistance you are likely to meet from them who are already in denial of their addiction. Instead, start throwing the idea into the conversation and assess your LGBTQ+ loved one’s response. If they seem amenable, you can schedule an appointment with the addiction therapist with ease and help them on their way to recovery. If they seem resistant, backpedal and try again later.
3. JournalingMost times, an LGBTQ+ person in denial of their addiction may genuinely not realize the extent to which they are drinking or using drugs. If you encourage them to keep a private and honest journal documenting how much they drink or use drugs, this is an important first step to helping them better understand the extent of the addiction struggle. Once they start seeing their intake itemized in their own handwriting, this can often indicate a drinking problem or a drug use problem.
4. Attending Addiction Recovery Meetings for LGBTQ+ PeopleMaybe your LGBTQ loved one is convinced they don’t have an addiction to drugs or alcohol. Perhaps they don’t have any intention of getting sober. In either case, attending just a single addiction recovery meeting might be a life-changing experience.
5. Stop insulating your LGBTQ+ loved one or friend from the negative consequences of addiction.Now, we understand it’s tempting and natural to be protective of your LGBTQ+ friends, loved ones, or family members as they are struggling with addiction. The truth is, if you enable this behavior, you’re simply perpetuating a vicious cycle of addiction. You should stop giving them money if you believe they’re using it to buy alcohol, drugs, or other addictive substances. Stop making excuses for them, and remove the safety net they have been relying on to continue drinking to excess or using drugs. Not all of these strategies will work in all situations. The best approach is to explore some of the above ideas with your LGBTQ+ loved one without using any kind of pressure at all. You can then test the waters and assess which approaches might be worth pursuing for them, as what works for one queer person might not work for the other.

We Can Help

Ultimately, starting on a new, healthier path is always possible, particularly when you work with the best detox and treatment center in California. Pride Detox is committed to helping people like you overcome addictions through comprehensive, science-backed treatments. With our assistance, you’ll gain the skills you need to live a full life going forward. Email us or call 1-562-525-5501 to get in touch with one of our representatives today.